It is our hope that
through this book you will be inspired to take part in your recovery
from whatever it is that you need to recover from. It is not our
intention to tell you what is best for you; I only want to share
what has worked for us. We are not PhD's, M.D.'s, gurus or
psychologists. We are a married couple who have danced the dance
with the life threatening disease called cancer. From the time we
met in 1975 we knew we had two choices, we could get bitter or we
could get better. We chose not to be victims. We decided we would
spend whatever precious time we have left together doing what we
loved. We have found what has worked for us after some real soul
searching; learning to trust our inner voices, our spirit. When I
say spirit I don't mean in the traditional religious sense. Yet to
me it is a religious experience. Dennis and I aren't into any
organized religion, yet very much into God, a greater Intelligence,
the Big Kahoona. We listened to our bodies and fed it what it craved
(no magic diet) and mastered an attitude that would help us through
living or dying.
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We all have our own
ways of dealing with adversity. Some bury their heads, while
others numb themselves with drugs. Others obediently obey
whatever doctors or anyone else say to them, blindly
refusing to question authority. That's fine, if that's how
you want to handle or not handle things. Taking
responsibility for one's illness or recovery is a tough
thought at first. Some folks think God is punishing them.
Some adopt an attitude that they can't do anything for
themselves, that somehow they have no control. Well, all we
can say to that is "If you THINK so." Learn to look at
adversity as a friend. Open your mind and heart. Take some
responsibility from here on out. After all, adversity is a
test that you can measure yourself by, to see how you are
doing as a human being. Discover what you're made of deep
down inside, how else would you find out? Adversity is an
opportunity for growth!
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If you are looking for
a cure, all that I can offer are resources to help aid you
on your journey. I can offer inspiration from a person who's
been there and one right in the thick of it like you. Make
this time in your life count. Take inventory of how your
life has been and where it's headed. Now is the time to make
changes in your life, because with this diagnosis you are
never going to be the same.
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Priorities
change when diagnosed and the things that were a big
deal yesterday suddenly won't be anymore. Choosing
to be healed doesn't eliminate you from dying. If
you die, you're not a failure. Make decisions that
you can live and die with. After all, no one gets
out alive. We're all in the parade and it's heading
one way. The choices you make from here on out are
ones that you will have to live with. It is our hope
that you educate yourself, and open your mind to the
right path for you. Trust yourself. Who knows your
body better than you do?
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I don't
believe that your biology is always your destiny.
Living beyond labels and statistics can be done.
None of us belong in boxes or as numbers in columns.
We are all unique, no two of us are alike, we need
only tune into ourselves to find our way through
this ordeal. To do this we have to put down the
illusions and emotional baggage we all seem to be
carrying. We can relearn to trust ourselves, acting
on our faith and not our fear. We can be free of the
labels, stereotyping and statistics, we can create
our own.
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Take a
look at the word responsibility. Contrary to
popular belief it's not a dirty word. Dr
Wayne Dyer says to break the word
down--response ability. Your ability to
respond. Cancer and illness happen because
of DNA factors, family histories, polluted
environments, emotional stress, bad habits
and unresolved conflicts and reasons that
are beyond our control and sight. All of
these things add up to dis-ease. Taking
responsibility for where you are at now and
what you will do to get better is in your
control. Your choice.We hope that you make
the most of the opportunities that will come
your way.
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With
this book you can skip around the chapters
or go straight to the resource section. We
have survived in spite of the extreme
adversity we faced. From being homeless,
struggling to stay alive, to getting a
business going again only to be diagnosed
with lung cancer. The Plan Of Action pages
that follow each chapter are the things we
did. The books and tapes listed in Resources
are valuable information. Some of it may
verify what you already knew or wake up that
part of you that was asleep or it could
shake, rattle and roll those of you who are
on automatic pilot.
Our
story is mentioned for inspiration and what
has been working for us, just a carpenter
and his wife.We are hardworking self
employed Americans, babyboomers.We've been
in the middle class and below poverty level,
but always rich in the love department. My
husband outlived all the doctors who
diagnosed him, and me? Well I don't know if
I'll outlive them but so far I think they
are pretty surprised I'm still here.
So if
you feel like you're about to fall off the
face of the earth-- Hold on. If you're short
on hope, you can borrow some of ours.
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